Shut up by Mendelssohn and Psalm 43

In all honesty, the last two days stunk!  The short version of the story (that doesn't give away information you don't need) is that I got in some minor trouble for something that shouldn't be an issue at all.  And I was mad!  I was livid!  I was trying to vent out my anger, and my poor old piano could barely take it!  


I was playing out of my favorite spread in the hymnal--nos. 509 and 510.  I started with 510, which is probably my favorite minor-key German chorale, "If You But Trust in God to Guide You" (Wer nur den lieben Gott lasst walten).  This is just fiery enough that I was hoping that it would help me vent some of the annoyance that I was feeling.


Then I turned to 509, "How Firm a Foundation," which has two of my favorite verses in all hymnody:

When thro' the deep waters I call thee to go,
The rivers of sorrow shall not overflow;
For I will be with thee, thy troubles to bless,
And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.


When thro' fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,
My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply;
The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design
Thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine.

Then I remembered that Emily said that the words to How Firm a Foundation worked really well to Immortal, Invisible, God Only Wise (ST. DENIO).  So I turned to no. 21 in my hymnal and began to play, trying to sing:

The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose,
I will not, I will not desert to His foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,
I'll never, no never, no never forsake!

And is still didn't help.  I was still angry.  I was still wanting vindication!


That was Thursday.  Friday was no better, in fact it was probably even more frustrating: I got into more of the same trouble about the thing that I didn't talk about, I had to work longer hours that I wanted and I was frankly tired and frustrated.  


I often start singing Choir music when I'm at home, and oftentimes I don't notice what I'm doing.  But I did yesterday.  I started singing Felix Mendelssohn's German setting of Psalm 43, "Richte mich, Gott."

Riche mich, Gott, und führe meine Sache
wider das unheilige Volk
und errette mich von den alschen und bösen Leuten.

Denn du bist der Gott meiner Stärke;
Warum verstössest du mich?
Warum lässest du mich so traurig geh’n,
wenn mein Feind mich drängt?

Sende dein Licht und deine Wahrheit,
dass sie mich leiten zu deinem heiligen Berge,und zu deiner Wohnung.  Dass ich hineingehe zum Altar Gottes,zu dem Gott, der meine Freude und Wonne ist, und dir, Gott, auf der Harfe danke, mein Gott.


Was bretrübst du dich, meine Seele,
und bist so unruhig in mir?  Harre auf Gott! Denn ich werde ihm noch danken, Dass er meines Angesichts Hülfe,
und mein Gott ist.

Vindicate me, O God, And plead my cause against an ungodly nation; Oh, deliver me from the deceitful and unjust man!


For  You are the God of my strength; Why do You cast me off?  Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?


Oh, send out Your light and Your truth!  Let them lead me; Let them ring me to Your holy hill And to Your tabernacle.  Then will I go to the altar of God, To God my exceeding joy; And on the harp I will praise You, O God, my God.


Why are you cast down, O my soul?  And why are you disquieted within me?  Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.

And that shut me up.  I had been yelling so all could hear, "Vindicate me, O God!" and I was ignoring the Holy Spirit telling me, "Hope in God!"  Another translation says, "Wait for God!"  The Holy Spirit had to splash me with cold water in order for me to shut up long enough to hear what I needed to hear.  I needed to hear that God will work it out, I just need to give it to him to fix!  Take it, Father.  It's yours.  I don't want it anymore.  


And that's how I was shut up by Mendelssohn and Psalm 43.

Scripture taken from the New King James Version
(c) 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.
Used by permission.  All rights reserved.